1.Dog On Wheels
When I was a boy I was confounded by you
Now I'm still a boy I am indebted to you
Every song I ever wrote was written for you
Written for you
Now I'm feeling flat you seem mile away
I'm so tired that down on the pavement I'll lay
Till the blossom on the tree comes falling on me
Fall on me
From my window I can see the mountains in snow
From my window I will shut my eyes and let go
Promise me you'll always be around when I call
And when I fall
On the river bridge up on the wall, looking down
On the river bridge, to me a vision was shown
If I could hold on to things till I was full grown
Peace would I know
To my dog on wheels I'll tell my pleasures and woes
To my dog on wheels I'll tell my secrets and more
Then one day in spring I'll take him down to the road
Anything goes
2.The State I Am In
I was surprised, I was happy for a day in 1975
I was puzzled by a dream, stayed with me all day in 1995
My brother had confessed that he was gay
It took the heat off me for a while
He stood up with a sailor friend
Made it known upon my sisters wedding day
I got married in a rush to save a kid from being deported
Now she's in love
I was so touched, I was moved to kick the crutches
From my crippled friend
She was not impressed that I cured her on the Sabbath
So I went to confess
When she saw the funny side, we introduced my child bride
To whisky and gin
The priest in the booth had a photographic memory
For all he had heard
He took all of my sins and he wrote a pocket novel called
'The State I Am In'
So I gave myself to God
There was a pregnant pause before he said ok
Now I spend my day turning tables round In Marks ＆ Spencer's
They don't seem to mind
I gave myself to sin
And I've been there and back again
I gave myself to Providence
The state that I am in
Oh love of mine, would you condescend to help me
I am stupid and blind
Desperation is the Devil's work, it is the folly of a boys empty
mind
Now I'm feeling dangerous, riding on city buses for a hobby is
sad
Lead me to a living end
I promised that I'd entertain my crippled friend
My crippled friend
3.String Bean Jean
I got my fingers dirty at the school of rock
Yeah I got my fingers dirty so I took a walk
I went up to the country park and hung around till after dark
Till the girls got home
Till the girls got home
Did I tell you 'bout the one I know, she's on the rag
She spent the summer day inside her sleeping bag
Yeah she spent the summer day inside until it's time to work
And she works all night
Cause the girl's all right
The girls have got a house that's like a caravan
And it's like your holidays whenever you go round
And we always have a laugh and then we all get in the bath
To save on the leccy bill
Me ＆ Jo ＆ Phil'
I had to leave them in the morning
I left the keys around the way
I had to catch a bus
I had to leave them in the morning
I left the keys down in the caf'
I had to go to work
And when Jo was short of cash I had to give her some
But I didn't really mind cause I was fit for once
So she paid the leccy bill and got the shopping and she still
had
Some for the cinema
So we all went out
She asked me 'Do I need to lose a bit of weight？'
And I told her 'Don't be stupid 'cause you're looking great'
And I call her String Bean Jean because the label on her jeans
says
Seven to eight years old - well that's pretty small
Seven to eight years old - that's pretty small
Seven to eight years old - that's pretty small
Seven to eight years old
4.Belle ＆ Sebastian
I left the school I left my job
You saw me looking like a slob
When I was young you were the only fun in town
Everyone thought it was a shame
For Belle and the boy Sebastian
Belle was ok but oh Sebastian
Went too far again
Crashed his car in the rain
He wants to love and he wants to care
But when the boys are queuing up to tell her she's a star
Poor Sebastian is heading for a fall
Everyone thought it was a shame
For Belle and the boy Sebastian
Everyone thought it was a shame
Belle was ok but oh Sebastian
Went too far again
Crashed his car in the rain
Oh Sebastian wrote his diary that
He would never be young again
But you will
Fellow, you are ill
You'd better take a weight off of your mind and listen
To what other people say
Cause things are going wrong your own way
5.Lazy Line Painter Jane
Working the village shop
Putting a poster up
Dreaming of anything
Dreaming of the time when you are free from all the trouble
you're in
In the mud, on your knees
Trying hard not to please
Anyone, all the time
Being a rebel's fine
But you go all the way to being brutal
You will have a boy tonight
You will have a boy tonight
On the first bus out of town
On the first bus out of town
Let's see your kit for games
All the girls look the same
You are challenging style for running miles
You're running miles in some boys jumper
Boo to the business world!
You know a girl who's tax free on her back and making
Plenty cash
While you are working for the joy of giving
You will have a boy tonight
You will have a boy tonight
And you hope that she will see
And you hope that she will see
You will have a boy tonight
Or maybe you will have a girl tonight
And you hope that she will see
And you hope that she will see
You are in two minds
Tossing a coin to decide whether you should tell your mum
About a dose of thrush you got while you were licking railings
But you read in a book
That you got free in boots
There are lotions, there are potions
You can take to hide your shame from all those prying eyes
Lazy jane, all the time
Painting lines
You are sleeping at bus stops
Wondering how you got your name
And what you're going to do about it
You will have a boy tonight
You will have a boy tonight
And you hope that she will see
And you hope that she will see
6.You Made Me Forget My Dreams
You made me forget my dreams
When I woke up to you sleeping
We had peace for a night at least
But the trouble starts today
This morning you'll say
'I'll see you sometime, maybe' and I
Fall back to uneasy sleep
You made me forget my dreams
I was building a space rocket
With the boy who played bass guitar
With the boy who's wearing flares
He didn't care
He lit the fuse and ran for a mile
The space rocket went up in style
The space rocket went up in style
I'll lend you two hundred quid
For a flight across the ocean
Maybe things will look better there
Because they couldn't be much worse
Than tears and a curse
For men with guns, maturing in age
Will always pay a shitty wage
They'll always pay a shitty wage
You made me forget my dreams
When I woke up to you sleeping
There was blood on the sheets again
And the view outside the window
Of gardens in bloom
Obscured by all the trouble we had
I think I better make a move
I think I better make a move
7.Photo Jenny
I'm in a mess, I'm in a dress
There's nothing from here till tomorrow morning
How will I get there？
I don't do drugs
All my friends are on their holidays
I go outside, it's not so bad
I saw my friend and he couldn't believe that
The girls were holding hands
The girls are holding hands
Don't be a fool
It's 1995, the girls are just friends
They got the drugs I could use but then I don't need any
All that I want is a photograph of photo jenny
How will I get one？ I don't know
How will I get one？ I don't know
How will I get her to strike a pose？
It's getting cold, I'll catch the bus
I saw my friend when she's finished working
Get some fish and chips
What's on the box？
'man about the house' with paula wilcox
You see the boy／girl's at the bar
Everyone thinks she's really ugly
But I shut my eyes
And the star of it is photo jenny
8.A Century Of Elvis
We were sitting in the living room on the sofa,
the wrong way round, looking out the window.
It was quiet, and then in the car park across the road
we saw Elvis - look, there beside the postman's van,
and he was walking round the postman's van,
looking in the open door.
He looked as if he was thinking about getting in,
but then the postman came back,
and he swaggered off,
walked past the window and down the stairs,
and then at the bottom of the stairs right
by the caretaker's office,
he started licking the pavement.
Every night now since we moved in that new house
there's this noise outside the door at just about half seven
or eight o' clock every night.
And if we go and look outside the door,
Elvis'll be standing there waiting to be let in.
And then he wanders into the living room,
maybe sits down on one of the chairs
or even lies down on the floor.
He doesn't say much,
he just stays there for an hour or two, watching the TV.
We talk to him a bit,
and then around ten o' clock, he'll go away again,
and not come back until the next night.
There's a lot of lanes and stuff around here,
around the house - although it's right in the middle
of the city it seems quite like the country,
it's dead hidden - safe I suppose, made for night living.
There's a lot of squirrels and birds,
and Stuart says he's seen about nine foxes
there when he's jumped over the fence on
his way to Prior's Road.
Sometimes you can go out walking,
and when you've been out for a wee while even you don't know
where you are anymore,
so it would be pretty hard for anyone else to find you.
I suppose that's why he spends so much time there,
that's why he's come to live there, or maybe it's
just the squirrels.
I read about somewhere that he likes squirrels quite a lot.
There's these two videos that we got for wedding presents -
called the e-files, e-files one and e-files two about how Elvis
is
supposed to be still alive.
And one time when he came round we were watching one of
those, but he didn't say anything he just sat on the armchair.
He was playing with his collar a bit, and we watched
it right through and then when it finished he just
got up and walked off into the mist and didn't say anything.
the first few times he came round I didn't speak to him at all,
I wasn't really sure what to say.
And Karen spoke to him quite a lot -
she seemed to know what to do more than I do.
He had quite a strange manner though,
he'd go into your stuff and look through it, then he'd maybe
pick something up and play with it for a wee while,
but he'd never make any comment about any of it.
Seemed pretty rude to me. I just watched whatever Karen did,
and listened to how she talked to him and then,
after a while I started to copy that, and tell him a few things,
not really bothered about whether he
responded or said anything back or not. I think the first time
I spoke to him we were sitting up on the mezzanine and
I said that I would tell him about me and wee Karen,
and how it was that we'd come to be living there.
I thought he probably liked the fact that we were
living there because he came round so much, so
I thought he might want to know how it was that it came about.
We did it all over backwards, I told him.
First of all we got to know each other,
and then a while after that we met,
and when we'd known each other for
about seven years we decided to have an anniversary,
and that went quite well,
so after the anniversary we had a honeymoon,
and that went well too,
so after that we decided that we would get married.
That's why we're living there now.
I used to think my dad was
Elvis, but I haven't told him that yet. I haven't told my dad
either...
9.A Century Of Fakers
There are people going hungry every day
They've got nothing on their plates
And you're filling your fat face with every different kind of
cake
And if you ever go lardy, or go lame
I will drop you straight away
That's the price you have to pay
For every stupid thing you say
There are people going lonely, and they'll stay
Lonely fay into the year
Because you're making blinkers fashionable
And fashionably you'll say
'All is equal in love and war' and
'I'm sorry, but I've got some things to do'
And you pretend to read a book you'll never finish till the day
That the author dedicates it
To A Century Of Fakers
They took your mould and they burned it on the fire in history
today
Yeah, the author dedicates it
To A Century Of Fakers
He was an anarchist, he tried his best but it wasn't good enough
Did I say I would see you soon？
Well I'm sorry, but i just came off my bike
And my face is scarred
And chance has barred me seeing you tonight
I was over the other side of the city
And if the truth be known I'd say
That you look great from there before you shaved your golden
hair today
Everybody's trying to make us
Another century of fakers
They took you mould and burned it on the fire of history today
Everybody's trying to make us
Another cool decade of fakers
Another century of fakers
10.Le Pastie De La Bourgeoise
Sunbeam shone, mousy girl on the end pew
You'd stay home, oh if only they let you
Le Pastie de la Bourgeoisie
Municipal pool, you're a junior life saver
But you're friends are all serious ravers
Le Pastie de la Bourgeoisie
Reading Judy Blume
But you came too soon
You're too tall, much too tall for a boyfriend
They run and hide, from your buck tooth and split ends
Don't be scared, like the books you've read
You're the heroine
You'll be doing fine
Wouldn't you like to get away？
Bestowing the memory of good and evil
On the ones you left behind
The heartless swine
And you love like nobody around you
How you love, and a halo surrounds you
Le Pastie de la Bourgeoisie
In the Autumn cool
Say cheerio to school
Listen Dear, I've been watching you lately
If I said all these things you would hate me
Le Pastie de la Bourgeoisie
At the church bazaar
I nearly went too far
Wouldn't you like to get away？
Give yourself up to the allure of
Catcher In The Rye
The future's swathed in Stars and Stripes
Wouldn't you like to get away？
Kerouac's beckoning with open arms,
And open roads of eucalyptus
Westward bound
11.Beautiful
She lay in bed all night watching the morning change
She lay in bed all night watching the colours change
She lay in bed all night watching the colours change into green
and gold
The doctor told her years ago that she was ill
The doctor told her years ago to take a pill
The doctor told her years ago that she'd go blind if she wasn't
careful
They let Lisa go blind
The world was at her feet and she was looking down
They let Lisa go blind
But everyone she knew thought she was beautiful
Only slightly mental
Beautiful, a bit temperamental
Beautiful, only slightly mental
Beautiful
She thought it would be fun to try photography
She thought it would be fun to try pornography
She thought it would be fun to try most anything
She was tired of sleeping
They let Lisa go blind, let Lisa go blind, let Lisa go blind
They let Lisa go blind
She's looking like a queen
But if you knew what's going on in her life
There'd be a thousand barren mothers there to talk to her
If you knew what's going on in her life
There'd be two hundred troubled teenagers to sit with her
And to talk to her
If you knew what's going on in her life
What's going on in her life
What's going on in her life
There would be a documentary on Radio 4
She made herself a pair of orthopaedic shoes
She thought it was the answer to the fashion blues
She mad herself a pair of orthopaedic shoes
But she walked with a limp
12.Put The Book Back On The Shelf
Sebastian you're in a mess
You had a dream, they called you king
Of all the hipsters, is it true？
Or are you still the queen？
Like getting blood out of a stone
The city left you all alone
You came to dance, but there's no poignancy
When they all leave you standing alone
The wider issues of the day
Don't interest you, you'll have to pay
For looking at the floor
When people talk to you
You wrote a book about yourself
The people left it on the shelf
You'll write another one
Now you've got a story that's worth talking about
Are you happy with yourself？
Are you talking to yourself？
Are you happy with yourself？
Put the book back on the shelf
I know the company you keep
You're on the sofa hidden deep
While on the telly Sid James speaks
To you like God
You're always looking for a sign
But boy you blow it every time
You hear a voice begin to speak
You ignore it and go softly to sleep
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-Lazy Line Painter Jane.jpg)